Welcome to Earth
Hello, son. You were born one week ago, Christmas Day, a few minutes after midnight. For someone so small, you’ve kept us well occupied.
There’s a lot to tell you about, son, but we have some time for that. For now I’ll just pass on a welcome message from Kurt Vonnegut as it’s good advice to get you going.
Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It’s round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you’ve got a hundred years here. There’s only one rule that I know of, babies — goddamn it, you’ve got to be kind.